Ups and Downs

I should start by apologizing for the dismal tone of my last blog entry. But that’s life in Senegal for you- first you are at the top of the world, wondering at how you managed to come to a new culture, integrate yourself into a third-world village and learn a new language, and the next moment you turn around a realize that you did in fact just leave everything you ever knew behind and it will be a long time until you can come back. That is what is known by PCVs, lovingly, as a mid-service crisis. But it’s not one major event that happens and passes, as I originally thought. I’m coming to realize that it comes and goes, just as everything in life. Even if I was in the States right now, I’m sure I would have bad times as well as good. The difference is that in the States, you usually have more of an open line of communication to vent and an ability to walk around the corner at all times, buy yourself some ice cream and move on with your life. Here, that angst manifests itself as angry blog entries.

In reality, I’m doing alright overall. I’ve been back in village for about a week, getting over a cold that I had, and getting my hands dirty outplanting all of those pepinieres I wrote about a while back. It’s a lot of work, but it is somewhat calming to work quietly in a field outside for a couple of hours and just let your mind wander. I’ve also taken the time to write in my personal journal every day, a practice I started years ago as a little kid, and I have taken up again while here as a way to process, record, and vent about my experiences. At some point I’ll be able to go home, re-read about all of these difficult times that I’ve made it through, and write new blog entries about how much I’ve learned.

In the meantime, I’ll continue to rant about my life and try to document all my experiences here to my loving readers. May you all keep enjoying TV, ice cream and internet every day. And may you all send me care packages on a regular basis.

Much love,

~E